How to Set Goals You'll Actually Achieve (The Complete Framework)

Hey girl.

Let me guess. You sat down on January 1 with a cute planner, wrote "new year, new me," circled it three times, and then that planner magically turned into a coaster by February.

Same. At one point my goals lived in my notes app, in my head, on random sticky notes, and zero of them lived in my actual life.

When people ask me how to set goals, they usually want a magic formula. "Tell me the secret so I never fall off again." I wish it worked like that. Goals are less about perfection and more about how you design them and how you treat yourself while you go after them.

This is the framework I use as a 22 year old who juggles content, a gym routine, reading, solo dates, healing, and my future Lyss 5.0 vision. I still miss the mark sometimes, but I hit a lot more than I used to, and my goals feel way more aligned now.

Grab your drink, your snacks, your planner that is not going back in the drawer this time, and let's talk.

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Why Most Goals Fail

Before we build better goals, we need to talk about why the old ones kept flopping. It is not because you are lazy or broken. It is usually because the goals were set up in a way that almost guaranteed disappointment.

The Problem with Vague Goals

"Be healthier."
"Make more money."
"Glow up."
"Work on myself."

These sound nice. They feel inspiring for about three minutes. Then your brain goes, "Ok, but what are we actually doing?"

Vague goals fail for a few reasons:

• You never know when you have "arrived"
• You cannot tell if you are making progress
• You have no clear plan, just vibes and pressure

Imagine telling your GPS: "Take me somewhere better." The poor thing would just sit there like, girl, please be serious.

Your brain needs directions.

So instead of "be healthier," try "go to the gym three times a week for 45 minutes" or "add one home cooked meal to my day on weekdays." That shift alone makes a huge difference.

Setting Too Many Goals at Once

Another big problem: You set ten giant goals at the same time.

You decide you are going to:

• Wake up at 5 am
• Go to the gym daily
• Stop scrolling in bed
• Read every night
• Start a side hustle
• Save a big amount of money
• Post on every platform
• Heal your inner child
• Drink a gallon of water
• Eat perfectly balanced meals 3 times a day

By day four you are exhausted, behind, and talking down to yourself. Then you label yourself as "inconsistent," when the truth is you tried to flip your whole life in one week.

Your nervous system is not a light switch. It likes gradual change. Big jumps are possible in some seasons, but if every goal you set feels heavy and impossible, the issue is the overload, not your character.

I like to think of my life as a stove. Only a couple of burners can stay on high at once. The others can be on low or completely off for now. That is not failure. That is strategy.

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The SMART Goal Framework (Updated for 2026)

You have probably heard of SMART goals. Good news, the basic idea still helps. We are just going to give it more soul so it fits our soft lux, big vision.

SMART stands for:

• Specific
• Measurable
• Achievable
• Relevant
• Time-bound

Let's run through each one in a very non-boring way.

Specific: Get Crystal Clear

General goal: "I want to read more."
Specific goal: "I will read 10 pages of a self-growth book before bed five nights a week."

General goal: "I want to grow my social media."
Specific goal: "I will post three long form videos and five short clips every week for the next three months."

Specific goals answer questions:

• What exactly am I doing?
• How often or how much?
• Where will this happen?

If someone else read your goal, they should be able to picture what you are doing without asking ten follow up questions.

Tip: Start your goal sentence with an action verb: "Walk, read, film, upload, study, call, cook, save, invest, stretch."

Measurable: Track Your Progress

If you cannot measure a goal, your brain has nothing to celebrate.

Humans love proof. That is why crossing things off a to do list feels so good.

To make goals measurable, add numbers:

• "Walk 8k steps a day."
• "Save 200 dollars a month."
• "Film two videos every week."
• "Journal for 10 minutes every morning."

You do not need an entire spreadsheet unless that makes you happy. A simple habit tracker, notes app, or calendar works. The point is to give your brain little wins to notice.

When you want a deeper alignment side to your goals, you can pair this practical piece with the mindset work from my Complete Guide to Manifestation. That post covers the inner side of what you are calling into your life and how your thoughts play into it.

Achievable: Stretch, Don't Break

This part is where a lot of overachievers mess up.

There is a difference between a stretch and a fantasy.

Stretch:
"I currently go to the gym once a week. I am going to bump that to three days for the next month."

Fantasy:
"I have not worked out in two years, and I am going to work out every single day at 5 am, no excuses."

One of those respects your reality while still pushing you. The other ignores your current habits and then beats you up when you cannot keep up.

Achievable does not mean small. It means honest. Ask yourself:

• What have I actually been doing so far?
• What level up feels challenging yet still possible?

Start there. You can always raise the bar once this level feels normal!

Relevant: Align with Your Values

You can set a hundred goals, but if they do not match your values, you will either fight them or forget them.

Relevant goals line up with:

• The kind of person you want to be
• The life you are building
• The season you are in

For example, if your top priorities right now are mental health and healing from a breakup, then a goal like "go on three dates a week" might not fit. A better fit could be "spend one night a week on a solo date with myself."

Ask yourself:

• Does this goal move me toward my ___ 5.0 version of me?
• Am I doing this for me, or to impress other people?

Goals feel lighter when they come from actual desire, not pressure!

Time-Bound: Create Urgency

Deadlines help. Not in a scary way, in a "let me focus" way.

Time-bound goals answer:

• When will I start?
• When will I check my progress?
• Is this a 30 day goal, 90 day goal, year long goal?

For instance:

• "By the end of this month, I will have filmed four long form videos."
• "For the next eight weeks, I will lift weights three days a week."
• "Within the next six months, I will save 1000 dollars for my emergency fund."

Time limits stop goals from floating in the air forever. They give you a clear time to review and adjust!

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Beyond SMART: The Psychology of Goal Achievement

SMART is cute, but your mind still runs the show. If your thoughts and habits are not on board, your goals stay as pretty sentences...

Let us talk about what happens inside your brain while you chase a goal.

Breaking Goals into Milestones

If your goal is "grow on YouTube," that is vague and massive. If your milestone is "post three times a week for 90 days," that is something you can actually follow.

Big goals feel less scary when you slice them into milestones:

• Outcome goal: "Run a 5k."

  • Milestone 1: Walk 10k steps daily.
  • Milestone 2: Jog for 5 minutes, walk 5 minutes, repeat.
  • Milestone 3: Follow a 5k training plan for eight weeks.

• Outcome goal: "Read 20 books this year."

  • Milestone 1: Finish one book a month.
  • Milestone 2: Read 10 pages a day.

Every milestone becomes its own mini win. That keeps your motivation steady, especially on days where the finish line feels far away!

The Power of Implementation Intentions

Fancy phrase, simple idea.

Implementation intentions are "if/when X, then Y" plans.

You decide in advance what you will do in a certain situation, so you do not argue with yourself in the moment.

Examples:

• "When I finish dinner, then I will lay out my gym clothes for tomorrow."
• "If it is 9 pm, then I put my phone across the room and read."
• "If I feel like skipping the gym, then I at least go and walk for 10 minutes."

This helps you run on decisions instead of mood. Your mood might say "stay in bed." Your plan says "we are doing our 10 minute walk." The plan wins more often when you already wrote it down. Trust me.

Building Accountability

Goal talk hits different when someone else knows!

You can build accountability in a few ways:

• Tell a trusted friend your goal and your timeline
• Start a group chat where you all send proof of your habits
• Share parts of your goal with your audience if that feels safe
• Use trackers and put them somewhere you see every day

During Vlogmas, for example, I told my audience I was posting every day until Christmas. That accountability felt intense, yet it pushed me to meet the challenge. I saw a new level of discipline in myself.

Pick your person or your system. You do not have to announce everything online. Even a quiet "I am checking in with you every Friday" with a friend can help a lot.

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Goal Categories to Consider

If you are not sure where to start, it can help to think in categories. That way you do not try to overhaul every single area at once.

Personal Growth Goals

These focus on who you are becoming inside.

Ideas:

• Read two self-growth books each month
• Journal three times a week
• Attend a therapy session biweekly
• Spend 30 minutes alone outside without your phone every weekend

Personal growth goals support everything else. When you build self-awareness, your choices improve in every category.

If you love routines, pair your growth goals with habits from my Complete Guide to Daily Routine. That guide shows you how to build mornings and evenings that actually support your goals instead of draining you.

Career Goals

Career does not only mean a traditional job. This can apply to school, business, content creation, or any path you are building.

Ideas:

• Apply to five internships or roles every week for a month
• Post three videos a week for 90 days
• Build a simple portfolio or website by a certain date
• Block two hours on weekends for skill building, like editing or design

Make career goals match your season. A full time student, a full time worker, and a full time creator will have different capacity. Your timeline can reflect that reality without shame.

Health Goals

Health goals cover body and mind.

Ideas:

• Hit 8k steps a day on weekdays
• Go to the gym three days a week
• Cook at home four nights a week
• Add one therapy or support group session to your month
• Create a bedtime that lets you get seven to eight hours of sleep most nights

When I stop moving my body and live on junk, my mood drops, my brain feels foggy, and my routines fall apart. Health goals are not about perfection or aesthetic. They are about feeling like you can actually live the life you are building.

Relationship Goals

We talk a lot about romantic goals, but friendship, family, and your relationship with yourself matter just as much.

Ideas:

• Plan one intentional hangout with a friend weekly
• Call a family member once a week
• Leave relationships that are clearly unsafe or draining
• Practice saying what you actually feel at least once a day
• Spend one night a week on a solo date with yourself

Relationship goals are where boundaries show up. Sometimes the "goal" is not to add more, but to remove what no longer aligns. That is still progress.

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FAQ Section

1. How many goals should I set at once?

Start small. For most people, three to five focused goals per season works well. You can have one or two big goals and a few smaller ones that feel lighter. If you look at your list and feel tired just reading it, that is a sign to cut it down.

2. What's the best goal-setting framework?

SMART is a solid starting point for anyone asking how to set goals in a clear way. Make your goals specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound, then layer your own style on top. The best framework is the one you will actually use, not the fanciest one you read about once.

3. How do I stay motivated to achieve my goals?

Motivation comes and goes, so do not build your whole plan around feeling hyped. Instead, create tiny daily actions, celebrate small wins, and use implementation intentions so you act from decisions, not mood. Accountability from friends, community, or a tracker can help you keep moving on days where motivation feels low.

4. Why do I keep failing to reach my goals?

Common reasons include setting vague goals, picking too many goals at once, ignoring your current capacity, and talking down to yourself every time you slip. Adjust your goals so they are clearer and smaller, and work on your self-talk so one missed day does not turn into quitting the whole plan.

5. Should I share my goals with others?

Sharing can help, as long as you choose people who actually support you. Some goals feel right to share online or with a group, while others feel better kept between you, your journal, and maybe one trusted friend. Check your motive. If you share goals just for validation, you might feel empty later. If you share for accountability and support, it can be powerful.

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If you remember nothing else from this post, remember this: you are not "bad at goals." You just have not had a plan that fits you yet.

You can start today with one clear goal, one tiny action, and one kinder thought about yourself. Then repeat. That is how goals move from your notes app into your reality!